A Room to Cheer About: The Difference Between Collecting and Hoarding

I remember the day about five years ago, when I stood in the living room of my first stranger-client (I call her that because she was my first client who found me on her own and who was not related to me or a friend, or a friend of a friend).

She had moved from a larger home to a two-level townhouse and she was in love with baskets, Longaberger Baskets to be exact, lots of them. She had moved several months prior, but the unopened boxes were overtaking her living space. During the consult she looked at me and with sincerity in her eyes asked, “Am I a hoarder?”

I was too young in my career to give a definitive professional answer, but I found out later that no, she wasn’t. She simply didn’t downsize properly and was dealing with overwhelm and avoidance--Very common reactions. But her question, I later found out, would be a common one clients ask.

Television shows inundate us with visions of true hoarders who cling to trash and treasure with the same extreme compulsion that we sometimes feel to our possessions. When it’s hard for us to let go or when we start “collecting” things, many of us start to wonder if we’ll soon have cameras documenting the narrow walkways in our homes.

Before you freak out and panic that you may also be labeled a hoarder, there’s something you should read first. A few years ago, I saved an article from my alumni magazine (Go Terps!).Below is a page from a true University of Maryland fan.In one room (man cave to be exact) Dennis Cyr truly pays homage to his alma

mater with organized collections in a room of red, gold and black. He is not a hoarder but a collector.

A hoarder according to Mayo Clinic: “Hoarding disorder is a persistent difficulty discarding or parting with possessions because of a perceived need to save them. A person with hoarding disorder experiences distress at the thought of getting rid of the items. Excessive accumulation of items, regardless of actual value, occurs.”

Dennis Cyr is a true collector which Mayo Clinic describes in more detail: “People who have collections, such as stamps or model cars, deliberately search out specific items, categorize them and carefully display their collections. Although collections can be large, they aren't usually cluttered and they don't cause the distress and impairments that are part of hoarding disorder.”

Mr. Cyr displays his collection proudly and in an organized way that shows his love of UMD Football.

Are you showing your collection love?  Or are they in unopened boxes? It’s time for spring cleaning.  It’s time to let go of trash and display or store with honor things that are treasure.

Need help? Feel free to reach out.

Confessions of an Organizer: Why My Home is Organized

When someone finds out that I’m a professional organizer, I often hear the statement: "So, I know your house is perfect." And to that I say "No, my house is organized.”

I'm a busy business owner with no kids, so it’s probably easier for me then a lot of the population. But if you aren’t quite organized, take heart! It could take months or even years of learning what works and putting it into practice to get organized. Everyone's situation changes throughout their lives which affects their level of organization. But there are basic principles of how you can stay organized.

Here is a list of reasons why my house is organized:

1. We don't own a lot of things

I'm no minimalist (although some of my clients may think I am), but we try to pair down and purge on a regular basis. I try to only have what I need and buy only for the space that I have. When shopping not only do I ask: “Do I need or want this?” I also ask, “Where will I put it?” Because we live in a cozy one-bedroom apartment the answer to that question often leaves the item at the store.

2. I learn from the struggles of my clients

When I'm with my clients I see time and time again the same resistance: emotional struggles and the turmoils associated with unnecessary acquisition and letting go of things. It's like I get the privilege of seeing the same lesson over and over again. My own personal Ground Hog day, and unlike Bill Murray’s character Phil, the day is different, the client is different and the things may be different, but again and again and again it's often the same challenges. I get to see the moral, and I try my best to "get it" when I practice the acquisition and letting go of things in my own life.

3. “The best things in life aren't things” quote means more to me than a pin on Pinterest  

This one is pretty self-explanatory, but I want to emphasize how important it is. The moments we experience and share with loved ones are always more important than the collection (and working for and maintenance) of more and more items.

4. I don't strive for perfection

I'm in my late 30's and I'm over what people think (mostly). With age, my spiritual perception, and a little help of Brené Brown and her book The Gifts of Imperfection, I’ve come to realize living life based on unrealistic expectation is unfruitful. Organizational bliss, in my opinion, is a cross between finding what you need, when you need it, and knowing what is priority in your life.  How things look is often just the icing on the cake. Ironically when you have priorities in place, and put your belongings where you can find them, things tend to look nice naturally.

5. I try never to organize for the sake of being organized or for what others think  

I organize because it adds value and supports the functions of my life. Overall, it allows me to have great experiences, and to do things and be with people who are important to me.

When I'm balanced, I'm happy, and it doesn't bother me that I didn't make up my bed (for the day) or the laundry basket is full if it’s for good reason. If I know I gave the more important things in my life attention, then I'm at peace. When I feed my soul (or things that make me, me), then I have the energy and the desire to take care of the day to day maintenance that being organized requires.

6. I make a game plan  

Sometimes having a game plan works out, but the fact that I had a plan in the first place often gives me the courage to start. If you were shipwrecked on a desert island, would you just jump into the sea hoping for the best? No. You'd get your Tom-Hanks-in-Cast-Away skills on and make a plan of action. It's still scary, but that fact that you thought about a plan of attack will help you move forward. And, if you happen to get stuck, you can always refer back to your original plan.

7. I delegate and I don't try to do it all by myself (anymore)

Honestly, if it weren't for my husband my house would only be organized 80% of the time…(Thanks, Honey).But he’s not the only person on my team who helps me get the job done. It’s important to call in for backup when we need it, it’ll help us get to the things we love to do much quicker. It took me a while to get that lesson.

8. I make sure all my things have a home

We have assigned homes to most things in our home and car. It’s a rare occasion that we are frantically clueless about where something is. This practice can save a lot of time. If we are looking for something we need to have a vague idea of where it is. If you have a drawer filled with random, miscellaneous items, it’s time to empty the drawer and give each thing a home to call its own.

9. I realize the rhythm of my week, and energy levels  

When I first ended my 9-5 career I was still stuck in that mentality. I soon realized that I need to get up and get started earlier to get everything done. Then I realized that my mental clarity was sharper in the morning and when I was alone.  Because of this, I do a lot more administrative and creative tasks (like my planning, bookkeeping, blog writing, social media) earlier in the day and more laborious but less mentally intensive tasks (like cleaning, exercise, folding clothes, responding to emails) tasks at night. I also realize that I don’t have the gumption to go the gym early, but I’m more likely to go at 9:00 p.m. than at 6:00 a.m. Instead of forcing myself to go to the gym early, I don’t waste  time or energy trying to drum up motivation in spite of my low-energy level. Understanding my personal rhythm and energy has allowed me to get more things done because I work on things that match my energy levels.  Where you have the luxury of setting your own schedule, make sure you do so effectively.

Every individual is different, and what I’ve found that works for me may not work for you.  And what works for me now, may not work for me later. It's about learning the ebb and flow of your life and taking steps to readjust when necessary.  

You can try to incorporate some of the things that worked for me and see what happens. If you’re still struggling to get your home organized, reach out. We can help you come up with some personalized solutions that may work better for you.

Andrea Hancock is a professional organizer & productivity consultant, blogger, speaker, and educator that assists and empowers busy professionals, entrepreneurs and those experiencing major life transitions to create and maintain organizational systems that work for them personally.  Andrea is also founder of Dexterous Organizing, a results-oriented professional organizing company.  Book a free 15-minute Discovery Call to begin your journey to better productivity and more organizational prowess or give us a call at (703) 606-8968.

Quote of the Month: "Any time you sincerely want to make a change, the first thing you must do is to raise your standards."